Life has a way of throwing us curveballs, doesn't it? I don't know about you, but these past couple of years have definitely been very TRANSFORMATIVE for me!
I have been challenged in every area of my life! When I say every, I mean E-V-E-R-Y...WOOO CHILE! Yet STILL I RISE!
I am a firm believer in every challenge that we face being just another character builder to help us become the finished product we were meant to be, if we let it. I also believe that if you conquered it, then you've been chosen to share with others how you did it, not so they can follow your steps but so that you can be the living proof that they too can make it to the other side.
So I'm doing exactly that! Below I've listed the TOP 5 tips that I've used to help me find beauty through uncertainty and dance my way through transformation! Feel free to take what you need and leave the rest.
Here we Go!!!
1. Feel allllllll the feels!
One thing about me, I'm going to allow myself to feel EXACTLY how I feel! That means if I feel mad, I won't disguise it with a smile. If I feel sad, I won't act like everything is ok. Notice I said if "I feel" not If "I AM mad or sad" because at my core that is NOT who I am, so I don't allow a temporary feeling or circumstance to determine who I am and how I should react. I honor my feelings, process what I need to and use the grounding technique of my choice to bring me back to center (walking, journaling, meditating etc), I never numb! I feel it so I can heal it and be done with it.
2. Roll with the punches!
Once I bring myself back to center, I find a way to look at the challenge as a chance to grow by taking the opportunity to learn from the unexpected situation. I ask myself questions like "What is this teaching/showing me?" so that I can be clear on how I should move from there, because once I find the answer you better believe I'm moving swiftly and accordingly! I take back my power by allowing the situation to work FOR me instead of sitting in the emotion that it's happening TO me. We may not always be able to control circumstances when they arise, but we can control how we react to them. Solutions come easier when you treat the unfavorable like a puzzle you're figuring out instead of a disaster.
3. Ask for Help!
This is the one that get's me EVERYTIME and I swear if we all were created with a list of lessons to learn attached to us THIS ONE right here is at the very top of mine! I will try to think of everything from A-Z before asking for help. It's cool to be self-sufficient but the reality is a lot of time gets wasted, unnecessary stress is added and sometimes SERIOUS consequences occur all because we are too prideful to ask for help. I was raised to never ask anyone for anything because you'd give people a reason to look down on you. In truth, if you can't ask your friends or family for help when you need it for fear of being talked about, are they really your friends/family? You might want to do an audit and rearrange your circle, I did! This is still a work in progress for me but I promise you my biggest PIVOTS have occurred when I bit the bullet and just simply asked for help. The person you ask may not have access to what you need but they may know someone else who does...but hey DON'T BE THE PERSON THAT ABUSES THE HELPFUL OKAY! It's not cool to be a LESSON to the person who was a BLESSING to you, signed someone whose had her share of lessons by way of ungrateful humans.
4. Amp up on Self-Care!
The first thing we tend to do when we are stressed is let ourselves go! It's almost like we put ourselves on punishment for not knowing what to do. Some people can't eat, sleep or even function well. These default reactions to stress can be so detrimental and if we're not careful it can lead to some irreversible damage. At the age of 16 I lost a VERY dear friend to stress, whenever her and her boyfriend were on the outs she would go on a hunger strike. I knew that it was all so that he would prove his love for her because I would hear her say to him "I didn't eat today" as if to hold it over his head that she was hurting herself because of him. My friend gave birth to a beautiful, healthy baby girl and passed away some months later due to anorexia nervosa. Self-Care is not a luxury, it's a necessity ESPECIALLY when you're going through rough times. It's not about escaping reality; it's about recharging your batteries so you can face challenges with a bit more resilience. It's hitting the RESET button. It can be as simple as having a cup of tea, going for a walk, a candle lit bath or whatever does it for you DO IT! Taking a moment to care for yourself isn't selfish; it's how you nurture yourself through the chaos.
5. Picture the win!
Picturing a positive outcome can seem kind of fake it til' you make it-ish but how on earth can you overcome an obstacle if you already see yourself defeated by it? Again, allow yourself to feel how you feel but always affirm that you will make it on the other side of the issue. Empower yourself by reminding yourself who you are! You're the same person who overcame the last challenge and the one before that! Being able to visualize yourself as a victor instead of a victim starts with actually having a healthy self-concept in place. When you know your strengths and actually own them, you won't be easily shaken by others or any unforeseen circumstance. You have to literally create a mental movie where YOU come out victorious against all odds! That simple exercise can give you the confidence and determination you need to face the unexpected with a positive outlook.
As we dance through the rhythm of life's uncertainties, remember that each challenge is a step closer to becoming the person you were meant to be. Feel every emotion, roll with the punches, don't be afraid to ask for help, take care of yourself and EXPECT THE WIN! If you need help finding your center through life's unexpected twists, book a session with me and together we'll work on ways to get you back on steady ground. Remember, your journey is uniquely yours, and every twist and turn is shaping you into a resilient, powerful individual. Keep moving, keep growing & keep SHINING!
Until next time, dance on!
Rachele is an Author, Coach
Human Design Specialist & the
Creator of the"Reflect & Affirm" Self-Love Activations